Is Single Motherhood The Enemy Of Men And Fatherhood?
I personally believe these women in the majority of cases choose to be single mothers right from the beginning, with the exception of widows, I don’t believe their is a pandemic of fathers leaving their children like the feminists blatantly lie about.
These women force men into paying alimony for 18 years, but don’t give them a chance to be parents themselves. They only want children and not a family.
What can men do to spot these wolves before being trapped by them ?
Well I am NOT a victim. I did NOT choose to be a single mother. I did NOT trap my partner who I dated for almost a year and was falling in love with. I did NOT make him pay child support. i am NOT on welfare. what i did was make an HONEST to God MISTAKE. YES women can make mistakes without choosing to be a mother.
And news flash he did leave on his own free will. he does NOT pay support he only saw her one time last dec. and he may see her at any time he knows this, i want my daughter to have her daddy in her life. but what the HELL should I do put a gun to his head.
Why would I want to be a single mother? the ONLY victim here is OUR daughter.
Yes there are some women who may want to be single mothers and YES many keep the kids away from the father and YES many do force men to pay for kids some even pay for kids who are not even their kids. yes single motherhood is getting out of hand. but many women do NOT choose to be single moms.
And YES I know the stats good God people send them almost everyday to me in email. I KNOW the stats by heart.
But many mothers have taken 100% responsibility for their actions and raise the children on their own. and let the guy leave without forcing child support. but no one hears about them no just the ones who make it hard for the rest of the ones.
And one more thing her daddy is NOT a dead beat dad. he knows he is welcome to see her anytime he wants. and NO iam NOT a victim of anything. it was MY fault and I took the responsibility for it.
ADD ON: You know you all can not have it both ways. I believe that if a man does not want to be in a childs life he should be able to have a choice just like the mother. he should be able to walk away without paying support. I support that 100%.
Now after saying that how can some of the same men come here and say men should be able to walk away from their kids. and then turn around and complain about how many single mothers we have now. it makes NO sense for the same men to say the man has a right to walk away and then complain when the woman takes care of her child alone that she is evil because her choice was to raise her on her own AFTER he told her how he felt. you can’t have it both ways people.
Like it or not SOME men not ALL men walk out on their kids many are kicked out. and YES SOME not ALL mothers walk out on their kids also. but still you can’t push for one thing and then say there are way to many single mother homes.
Single motherhood is the enemy of single mothers. The question is why they’re single in the first place<– They will always say its because he’s a no-good wanker, and i have no doubt that “Sometimes” its true. But most of the time, they’re single because they shouldn’t have relationships. A man won’t just leave and abandon his children unless theres a reason, and it has to be a GOOD reason too. Sometimes its best for the kid to grow up without watching their parents hate each other. If she’s making him miserable and trying to control EVERY aspect of his life, trying to make his decisions for him, believing she knows whats best for him etc etc…Then the man will unquestionably in time, leave her to be a single mother.
Nancy Drew – do you think it’s time you got away from the TV? Be a big girl now. It’s ignorant to project your bitter personal experiences onto everyone else.
Check the child abuse stats please:
From 2003, so it’s bound to be worse now:http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/pubs/…
So basically mothers are worse to their kis than fathers. Ohh WoW, I never thought that.http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/pubs/…
Ohh WoW, look mothers also kill children more than fathers do! Amazing stuff. And look it’s mother acting a lone 40% of the time, could that be SINGLE MOTHERS??
Do I make myself clear? We are both bad, women are just not blamed when they do evil, they are always the victim, alway. A woman could murder all her kids and women’s centers come out to defend her. Go on, tell us all that men rape more in order to worm out of it!
That makes no sense. Why would anyone want to be a single mother? Can’t go to college because she has to take care of her kid and work.
Doesn’t have a lot of money for herself and her child.
Everyday, waking up to go to a suckish job to receive minimum wage.
As you can see, it’s not fun. So why are you suggesting the mothers want to have that life other than a nice, happy relationship?
Do you really think it’s a conspiracy ?
I think it’s just poor sex education and poor access to affordable, effective contraception.
Oh, and you need to look up the word alimony….you are using it as a substitute for child support. They are 2 different things.
so you’re saying single mothers chose to have there husbands abuse them, they chose to have their husbands die, you are saying they want to have to work 2 or 3 jobs just to put food on the table, if you really think that it’s quite sadhttp://www.chatzy.com/353953143430
More men abandon their children, abuse whole families, don’t pay child support and don’t care about the wife having to raise them on her own.
If men don’t want children then they shouldn’t get women pregnant and abandon them.
It’s an even bigger enemy to the children raised that way.
Deadbeat dads are the enemy of fathers’ rights.
No… it’s the result of it’s absence.
It is not a lie. I am living proof that some men can and DO abandon wives and children for their own selfish reasons!
I am sick of people like you who put down single mothers and treat us like we’re pariahs and act like the men are all oh-so-innocent when that is not the case. Why are you insulting the women and refusing to see the truth about some of those men, the REAL wolves? I’m not saying all men are like that…but some indeed are and it’s a real slap in the face for someone like you to put the blame 100% on the single mothers like this.
My story?
My husband wilfully walked out of our marriage of 9 years because in his words “I don’t love you, I have not loved you for a long time. Life is too short to be miserable. I want to see other women!”
We had recently moved to a state where I didn’t know a soul. He began an affair and left me for this other woman. So there I was abandoned, with a very part time job, no money to go anyplace else…and a family of origin who told me if I return to my hometown, they’d consider me a financial burden…and it didn’t help matters when my mother died six months after my divorce was finalized and I had to take care of all that too! So I lose a husband AND a parent in a short time frame. I literally had to start over at ground zero…and try to keep me and my child clothed, fed and house. We tried to stay out of the court room, but the 1st child support check my ex wrote me BOUNCED so of course I took him to court. I never wanted the divorce, but what choice did I have? Wait for him to ‘come to his senses and come home’ when he made it clear he didn’t feel it was his home and he had found “home” with other women? His first trick was a disappearing act, what would be the next? sawing me in half? The only reason I filed the divorce papers was because my lawyer told me the only way I’d be able to get any sort of support would be to file for the divorce first. Everyone was telling me one of two things: either “don’t be in a hurry to get a divorce” or “you need to let him go if he doesn’t want you.” No matter what I did, I would’ve been considered the one in the wrong. I’ll never forget the look in his eyes when he came to the house with the divorce papers I had served on him. I cried and cried for days after that.
Not only did he show irresponsibility in the area of child support, he also blew off visitations, and he showed absolutely no interest in his daughter until she was 12, and only because he was getting re-married to a woman with two children and he was trying to impress her with what a “wonderful” father he is! In fact, all too often his blood daughter was treated more like a guest in the house than his own family.
He callously moved on to celebrate his “bachelorhood” and later remarriage to a frickin’ mail order bride. He comes off looking good, but the fact remains the same that he left me and his daughter nearly destitute! My biggest fear for many years was that we’d wind up on the street! Despite eventually getting child support which was so small it barely covered rent, and my working two jobs and then being able to go to college and earn a degree, I still struggled financially for many years, and I’m still struggling to this very day…while he has the “good life” with young pretty wifey #2 and their fancy schmancy house with a pool, the SUV, and the social life!!!
and yet, single mothers are the enemy? the ones at fault????
I did the best I could to be mother and father for my daugher with what little resources I had .and yet in the eyes of some people I still wasn’t good enough, or I was somehow morally questionable for raising a child on my own and I was still being told I was not measuring up because “there’s not a father in the house!”
Yes, I was and to an extent still am very angry and bitter about all this, but yet I’m told I’m supposed to “forgive” him and forget it as if all those years never happened! Then you come along and kick me in the teeth by saying because I’m a single parent I am the “enemy?” My ex-husband took a DECADE of my life away from me…but yet I’m the “bad” one??? The wolf????
HOW DARE YOU!!!!
How is it that I’m the one who gets criticized for being a single parent while he gets off scot free and looks like the good guy ? That doesn’t seem fair to me at all.
As far as I’m concerned, he not only broke his marriage vow, his promise to me , he broke my heart almost irreparably. It took me nearly 12 year before I could find another man whom I could trust…and I’m still not even sure of that.
I don’t take marriage lightly. In fact, despite the successes I’ve had in my life, I consider my divorce my life’s biggest failure..it overshadows virtually everything I do…and so I don’t need you or anyone else coming around to kick sand in my face for it…just because you get your thrills like that!!!
This pandemic that you speak about seems to be very young single mothers, who as you say haven’t opted into marriage and family, they just have children. I agree that many of these young women have actively chosen to have children because of the benefits they bring( usually state benefits!) without a thought for the childs need for a stable family and a father.
I think it is a very sad situation when you have men who do want to parent their children but are prevented from being involved. It is bad for children and bad for these fathers.
The acceptance of single motherhood has been brought about primarily because of feminism. Although many make the point that the tax and benefits system has encouraged this. It needs to be understood that a gaggle of women politicians were actually in charge of putting together the social/economic part of the first new labour party manifesto. It is this gaggle of feminists who have pushed these ideas through and made laws that now encourage single parenthood and state dependancy.
This does nothing to further the course of equality. What choice is there depend on a man, or depend on wellfare! either way you are dependant on someone once you have children.
“”I personally believe these women in the majority of cases choose to be single mothers right from the beginning,”"
No, a lot of them don’t. I’d say the number that actively choose it is somewhere near 10% and the rest are there because their relationship imploded. And you can NOT tell me that that’s all the woman’s fault. There are a lot of men who take off once they find out their girlfriend is pregnant.
Maybe if more couples actually saved sex until they know each other for longer than a few weeks or months, there’d be less single parents. Hey here’s a crazy thought – maybe if people saved sex for their *wedding night*, this problem would nearly disappear. Of course, you’d also have to be careful who you marry and not marry someone you can’t stop fighting with.
Radical, eh?
“”What can men do to spot these wolves before being trapped by them ?”"
Don’t treat them like blow up dolls and just use ‘em for your own pleasure. No more one night stands or diving into bed with a new girlfriend after a couple of dates. Act like you’ve got a brain and a modicum of self-control, and save sex in a relationship until you know her really well and are sure she’s the one you want to be the mother of your 86 children, and be with for life. Then you won’t have to worry about it.
It’s up to you. It’s your future and your future kids. You do the right thing too.